Communication…sounds simple right? As I am getting older, I am starting to realize it’s not that easy after all? When I was young, I used to think…well…if I have a problem or something…good to say…I simply speak my mind. Be straightforward without duplicity and people will get it. No strings attached…right? Boy…was I wrong. Growing up…as a result of this mentality, I ended up making more people angry and frustrated with me than the other way round. I couldn’t really put my finger to it and isolate the problem. In fact, I lost a career because of such open and straightforward approach. People (mostly the grownups) do not like to be told anything…that is something I have learnt the hard way and in reality still learning. I am the opposite, I like people to tell me what to do but of course I expect the person telling me to be more qualified than I…anyways that can open its own can of worms.
Communication is so very essential that merely articulate word sentences do not convey the message. For me to communicate well, one thing I found is essential - people listening to you should either be attracted to you as an individual or be attracted to the message being delivered. If you are going to say something that will ruffle up some feathers, then, you are not a very popular person followed by which my communication will start to fail to the point where it stops completely.
Therefore, I have learnt over the years that I have to be careful in speaking the “truth” and say it in such a way that it does not hurt the ego of the person. This is the crux in good communication. How to speak without hurting the ego of a person? I am not suggesting flattery…no…actually it is quite the opposite. I am speaking of truth delivered in a compassionate tone of “I am hearing your voice but I think this is much more beneficial for you”. If through my words we communicate that what I am saying will be actually more beneficial to you (materially or spiritually), if the counterpart gets this, then I think they will open their ears to listen to what we have to say.
Therefore it is our prime duty to convince them that we are not here to threaten their boundaries or disparage them in anyway, but we are here to enhance and help them live a better life be it material or spiritual. To do all this (that is efficient communication) requires compassion, tolerance, respect for the other and a high sense of integrity for the self. Articulation of speech is not a very significant criterion for communication. Of course…even after all the communication…there are hard headed individuals who will have their way as the “way”…as far as we are concerned we move on.